RICHMOND, Virginia – After meeting with friends one evening, Alexis Wilber returned home to encounter an unknown man with a gun on her front porch.
Entering the back door of her Fulton-area home, she walked to the front door to determine why the porch light had gone out. Opening the door, she was startled to find a threatening intruder with a gun, refusing to leave her front porch.
“It was scary and intimidating,” said Wilber, who was home alone. “I immediately shut the door and called 911. I hid in a corner of my house.”
Emergency Communications Officer Ashley Marlow was working the final hour of an overtime shift when she answered Wilber’s call on March 6, 2022.
Although it began just like so many other calls Marlow has answered, it turned into a 37-minute ordeal, while the stranger remained on Wilber’s porch and later exchanged gunfire with Richmond Police officers.
“It was so surreal … like something out of a movie,” Marlow said of the incident. “I was thinking of all of the things that could have gone wrong and hoping the caller would be OK.”
Throughout the call, Marlow reassured Wilber, kept her calm, explained what was happening outside and advised her on how to stay safe. She also got important information from her to help Police officers once they arrived on the scene.
Photo courtesy of Virginia APCO
For her professionalism in handling the call, Marlow was honored with the award for Individual Performance in a Critical Incident from the Virginia Association of Public-Safety Communications Officials (APCO). It was presented on May 9, 2023, during the organization’s joint Spring Conference with the Virginia National Emergency Number Association (NENA) in Williamsburg.
It is the first such statewide award to be presented to a staff member of the Richmond Department of Emergency Communications, Preparedness and Response, and one of only two such awards presented this year.
“The exceptional caring and professionalism, combined with quick thinking, that ECO Marlow displays in this incident is in large part responsible for this Richmond resident staying safe,” said Director Stephen Willoughby. “It is indicative of what our staff do all day, every day, behind the scenes, to respond to requests for help and work together with our public safety partners. And it is a reflection on the hard work we put into making sure we have the necessary equipment and resources, as well as the best and most well trained staff to serve our community, and keep everyone safe. ”
Marlow focused on keeping Wilber calm and safe from the start of the call, through the wait for Police to arrive and to the end after shots were fired. Marlow first determines where Wilber is in the home and tells her, “I’m going to stay on the phone with you, OK. Just remain quiet, but tell me if you see anything or hear anything,” she tells her.
Wilber asks several times during the call whether she should look out the window or turn on her doorbell video. “Don’t do anything to draw attention,” Marlow tells her. Once police arrive, she tells her, “I’m going to make sure it’s clear, before I tell you to come to the door.” When Wilber is frightened by gunshots, “They’re getting help. Just stay where you are,” she says.
While on the call, Marlow said she imagined herself in Wilber’s place. “This could be me. I live right down the street,” she said she thought.
For days afterward, Marlow said she could not sleep, replaying the “what ifs” in her mind. She explained that while emergency communications officers are able to remain calm and focus on their work, afterward they deal with the feelings that come from an emotional connection to others.
“You deal with other people’s issues all the time and then go home to your own issues,” she said.
Program and Operations Manager Felicia Roane understood her concern. When she listened to the recording of the call, she said she knew that Marlow would be wondering how the caller was doing, and she wanted to help her gain closure on the incident.
Working with the department’s Critical Incident Stress Management team and the Richmond Police Department, Roane arranged for Marlow to meet Wilber at her home four days after the incident.
Wilber showed Marlow the porch light that went out, where the man was leaning on the porch, the window she considered looking out, and where she hid on the floor while they were on the call.
She thanked her over and over for keeping her calm.
“I’m just so thankful for you,” Wilber told Marlow. “You truly helped me through this, because I couldn’t do this without you.”
Marlow thanked Wilber for providing all of the necessary information and remaining calm and patient. Both said the meeting helped them process what happened and were thankful to be able to meet.
When people ask what the job is like, Marlow said she tells them it’s like reading an entire novel but then ripping out the end. In 14 years as an emergency communication officer, it was her first time meeting someone she had helped on a call.
“It helps me too. I didn’t think I’d get this opportunity,” Marlow said.
During the meeting, the two women cried, hugged and did not want to say goodbye.
They remained in contact, and months later, Wilber agreed to record a message of thanks for the city of Richmond’s public safety appreciation day.
“I don’t think that dispatch gets the recognition that they deserve in situations, especially like this,” she said. “They do their best to keep you calm in these kinds of situations, and then they let you go. But in the end of the day, it still affects them. They have to go through it as well … I’m really grateful.”
